My dream Life, becoming my Real Life!

This song popped into my head yesterday and it was so very timely.

I had a great devotion time with the Lord yesterday in which He pointed out Deuteronomy 30. To be quite honest, I opened up my bible app and this was the chapter that was staring me in the face, I had not looked it up previously...it was just there!

In this chapter it covers the concept of choosing life or death. It begins with, "So it shall be when all of these things have come upon you, the blessing and the curse which I have set before you.." I was amazed. I guess with all the turmoil of last month I had forgotten one significant detail of the process,... my choice in it all. With finding out my ex got married 3 months after our break up, my beloved pup passing, the landlord refusing repair of my oven of which I had no money to fix, and turning 40 I had a choice to make, to either choose life or death, to see all this as a blessing or a curse. I admit it that these things were truly devastating to me, as those around me can attest that I didn't think I would make it, but after the emotional dust settles I have had to decide what to do with this information. Do I file it in the curse file? Deeming this as some sort of plan of the evil one to destroy me? Or do I file it in the blessings file? Gleaning understanding and knowledge knowing that only God can give Satan permission to mess with me so I can learn and grow? I am not minimizing these events and again they were tremendously hard to endure but now that the emotions are subsiding can I look more objectively at these things? That is the question I became aware of yesterday.

Some points that jumped out at me from Deut. 30 were "the Lord your God will restore you from captivity, and have compassion on you..", "The Lord your God will bring you into the land which your fathers possessed, and you shall possess it; and He will prosper you and multiply you..", "Then the Lord your God will prosper you abundantly in all the work of your hand, in the offspring of your body...the Lord will again rejoice over you for good...", "See I have set before you today life and prosperity, and death and adversity", "..the Lord you God may bless you in the land where you are entering to possess it. But if your heart turns away...you shall surely perish.", and "I call heaven and earth to witness against you today, that I have set before you life and death, the blessing and the curse. So choose life in order that you may live.." This was not absolutely clear but I knew yesterday morning that I was back in the driver's seat, so to speak, as far as choosing life or death, blessing or cursing. Choosing God's vision or choosing my narrow and mostly dismal view of the present and future.

I decided yesterday to investigate a local pottery studio. On my birthday a dear friend brought me flowers and for the first time saw the ceramics I have created, which are all over my home. She instantly started taking pictures and telling me I should have these in a gallery in town. It was at that moment that I started to dream again and by the end of our visit she chose three pieces, of which she wants to purchase one. Due to this visit I rediscovered the deep desire in me to create so I went to the pottery studio so I would have a place to create more. This kindled my creative spirit and my mind was immediately flooded with creative ideas to try. To say the least it was refreshing and encouraging to think that in me God has placed amazing gifts and talents to be shared with the world.

Now there is only one person, in my life who truly fostered my creative spirit in a way no other has, and that person has not been my favorite person as of late; however, this individual actually finally questioned my educational endeavors, telling me that I really should be doing artwork instead. Perhaps if this person had been more upfront with other aspects of life things would have been different but then again maybe that was the only part that individual had to play in my life but it was key so I guess I have them to thank for that. Due to this and the song referenced above, the verse about "no more wasting time on what I think I am supposed to do", I have decided that my artwork will not be just a hobby but a major part of my career and life. I am still going to finish my degree but will have two careers and the two are not so independent so that they can not be complementary.

In the process of coming back to myself and finding my peace I realize I have a lot to be thankful for! I am finding my peace in the simple things like the cool breeze of the mornings, the smile on the faces of my children, and the beauty of hope and passion for life. Contentment of my own pace is my current learning path and not to be constantly thinking I have to rush to keep up with the pace of others. Slowing down to enjoy the moments, thank God for the beauty that surrounds me and is in me. It is in that appreciation, I am realizing that I am an amazing beautiful piece of artwork signed by the creator for an amazing purpose and success is right around the corner!

I can now say that I am becoming more aware of how things which looked like they were for my bad were actually the best thing for me. In recognizing my own worth and those things that make me unique, I can see how things that were not healthy for me. I am a dreamer, an independent creator who paves her own path and is strong enough to believe. And in the slowing down to my own pace I find more, more acceptance, more peace, more joy, more love, more of a place of where I belong and my beauty can flourish!

This life is not easy but I choose life and blessing because that is simply who I am! When I step back and look at the things I have been through I am a bit surprised at the strength and resiliency that comes from with in. Like the group lighthouse sings in the song Broken, about holding on for one more day to see what is thrown my way, will always be my theme song illustrating how deep down I know I will not be destroyed by this life because I choose life, love, and my Lord above all. Besides, scar tissue grows back stronger anyway.

So today I challenge you to choose life over death, choose blessing over cursing, choose love over anger and hate it is the pathway to peace and abundance!

Blessings!